Empathetic Presence
Empathetic Presence is a podcast to liberate our voices, from silencing systems, speaking anxiety, and over-thinking. We don’t need more Executive Presence. We need empathetic, present leadership more than ever. Hosted by Self-Expression Strategist Lee Bonvissuto, each episode will share tools to help us express ourselves in big moments and feature interviews with empathetic experts who are creating cultures where we can all be heard.
Empathetic Presence
The Power of Words with Christina Ferguson
In this episode of Empathetic Presence, I sit down with Christina Ferguson, founder and chief storyteller at Parable, to explore how words are "the primary vehicle in which we are human."
Christina helps mission-driven organizations and leaders tap into their true identity—not by branding something external onto them, but by letting what's already inside come out. We dive deep into why so many of us struggle with our voices, whether written or spoken, and how we've lost the art of self-reflection in our hyper-connected world.
What we explore:
- Why identity work must come before mission and vision
- How AI is removing the essential friction from our creative process
- The difference between branding (stamping something on) and authentic expression (letting what's in come out)
- How organizations can stay true to their values in challenging moments
- Practical ways to develop self-knowing through reflection and spaciousness
Christina shares her process of helping clients excavate their mission through questions rather than quick fixes, and why she believes "the process is the point."
This conversation will resonate with anyone who wants to express themselves more authentically—whether you're leading an organization or just trying to find your own voice in a noisy world.
Christina is a storyteller and meaning-maker. As the Founder and Chief Storyteller at Parable, she empowers leaders to put fresh, compelling words to who they are, where they're headed, and how they'll get there. Christina's expertise in communications, strategy, sales, and change management makes her a powerful partner for leaders and teams looking to scale more authentically. Christina has held positions in both the for-profit and nonprofit sectors, including nonprofit fundraising firm Graham-Pelton, Georgetown University, and Ashoka. Christina holds a Bachelor of Science in Finance from Villanova University and a Master of Public Policy from Georgetown University. She is a graduate of the Leading Organizational Change program through Wharton Executive Education at the University of Pennsylvania.
Welcome back to Empathetic Presence. I have been thinking so much about the power of words, and I just had to have a conversation with my colleague and client Christina Ferguson, founder of Parable. Christina talks about how words are the primary vehicle in which we are human Christina is a storyteller and meaning maker, and as founder and chief storyteller at Parable she empowers leaders to put fresh, compelling words to who they are, where they're headed, and how they'll get there. Christina's company supports many mission-driven organizations, and I loved hearing about her process of helping founders and teams excavate their mission and their message. She sees storytelling as an act of self knowing. I hope you enjoy this conversation with Christina Ferguson Welcome, Christina to the Empathetic Presence Podcast. Hi Lee. Thank you so much. I am so thrilled to talk to you, Christina, because you understand the power of words and we are in a moment right now where words are really so important. And you and I have known each other for so some time. And you are the founder of Parable. Can you tell us a little bit about Parable? Yes. Uh, you know, we work with organizations and leaders who are looking to tap into their identity and really live it out loud and tell the story about who they are and what they do. Um, I have yet to come up with a really good term for that'cause I kind of bristle at the idea or the term of branding or marketing. Because it seems to me to lack a little bit of that inner process that needs to happen in order to really step into one's identity as an organization or a leader like I mentioned. Um, but that's what we do and it's so fun and there's so many ways that then it comes into life through different marketing channels, through different, uh, communications channels for an organization. I love that you talk about identity, and I really wanna kinda dig into that word with you because it can mean so many different things and I know it's so important, but I think a lot of us struggle to find our voice with writing, with speaking. So what do you mean by identity? I mean who or who a leader truly is, or who an organization truly is. And. When I think about the two worlds of professional and personal, there's usually some center of the Venn diagram where this identity lives, where it's not, not entirely, you know, personal, my favorite color, or you know, what I like to do on the weekend. And it's not solely professional. It's, it's that beautiful blend of just the self. I think that carries over to the organization as well of what was an organization's very purpose from the start of its founding. How has it evolved? And, but what core tenets and threads just carry through no matter what. Strategic priorities change, no matter how, uh, the moment is changing, there are certain pillars that will always remain the same. And what I find is that organizations and leaders. We can have a hard time remembering what those are when we're caught up in the day to day of doing the thing of running the business, running the nonprofit, advocating out in the community. Uh. So the way I like to describe the process of, of finding and reclaiming one's identity in this way is like holding up a mirror to to to point to clients, whether they are organizations or individuals to say, this is what you're doing. These are the words you're using. Uh, here's, here's what vibe, you know, you're giving mov. And a lot of times we don't realize that for ourselves because. We're just doing it all the time. We don't tend to stop and think that how we might be doing something is different or unique from anybody else, and it's only with an outside perspective that we can realize, oh, oh, this is my identity, because yeah, not everyone is actually doing it this way. Wow. It can be such a differentiator. Mm-hmm. Right. Yes. And I, first of all, I would just wanna go back to something that you said, an uplift that you said you don't love the word branding, and I'm also struggling with that word because. So many actually organizations have been asking recently for me to do like personal branding workshops. Yeah. And this is a term that I think gets really corporate and we can't find our own identity in it. And so hearing you say that identity is about reclaiming who you truly are, whether it's an individual or an organization, feels really refreshing because it is about truth and honesty. Yeah. There's a simplicity to that. I agree. Uh, now I might be fact checked and proven wrong here, but, uh, when I think of the word branding, what I, where I think it comes from is to brand a cattle or, or some, right, some livestock, right? That, that's the process of imprinting something external that wasn't there before. And that's why it doesn't sit well with me because. What I think of true, authentic branding is letting what's in come out how. Does that make sense? Letting what's in come? Of course it makes sense, Christina. And you know, even this discrepancy that you're talking about between how we think we're perceived versus how we feel internally, that's something that I see with my clients all the time. I work with people who are sure that people can see how nervous they are or think they're being perceived in a certain way, and we have to eliminate that discrepancy in order for them to truly connect. To their identity. Yes. Agreed. It's, it's, it's thinking about where is the information or the spirit or whatever inspiration, where is it, what direction is it flowing in, like coming from outside air inside out. And I think you and I would both agree, like the magic happens when it's coming from inside out. Yes. And when we stop looking for that external validation. Yeah. And so what you're talking about makes it sound like your process with your clients is really about a unraveling mm-hmm. And right. A revealing of what's already there. Totally, yes. You know. It's, it's about getting to the core of, of, again, what an organization or individuals is doing, uh, and why, and those things don't really change and they've changed very little from, from a founding or, you know, from a historical context. Uh, and I find the process to arrive at that is, is. Figuring out ways for the organization again, or the leader to really just be themselves. Like, speak off the cuff. Tell me what you actually think. Tell me in your, just in your own words, like, no one's recording this. Just tell me what you do. Tell me why you love it. Uh, if you could do nothing else but this one thing, what would it be? You know, really, we kind of, it's, it feels almost like a therapy session sometimes to start off because it's getting to the heart of the individual. And every organization is made up of individuals. And you know, even for me, I've been doing this work for 10 years and it's only this year that I feel like I finally am finding the language, the words to articulate what I do. Yes. And I wanna know like, what is it about words? Because some of us feel. More natural in the written word. Others of us feel more natural in the spoken word. What is it about writing and words? Yeah. Yeah. That's such a great question. I, I, I can think of maybe four kinds of human connection. I could think of human touch, which is reserved for a very small circle of people in our lives. I can think of art. So music, painting, photography, dance, uh, usually absent of words. Uh, and I can think of shared action or experience. So ritual, a meal, an act of service that even in silence might bring people together and form some connection. And then I can think of words. And of those four, I really think words are the most prominent and convenient. And it's, it's, it's the media we use, uh, whether written or spoken or sung or chanted. Uh, it's, it's, it's the, the primary vehicle in which we're human. It's the primary vehicle in which we're human. I think, but maybe I'm biased'cause I write. I agree with you though, and I do believe that that's what sets us apart from other mammals is our ability to communicate in the way that we do, and interpret and analyze and judge and critique, you know? And hearing you even say that words are the primary vehicle of expression of humanity. Yeah. It makes sense to me then why there's so much darn anxiety Oh, around yes. Words and our voices, whether written or spoken, right? Yes, absolutely. And I think part of that anxiety, if I had to guess, uh, part of it is, is for sure that feeling of self-consciousness that anyone or most people might feel in sharing a part of themselves.'cause there's a vulnerability that's required there. The other part that I do think plays into this is I think as a culture, we have lost to some extent the ability to self-reflect, and I think self-reflection is so necessary to be able to use words, whether in speech or in writing. I was reading a book recently that is really blowing my mind and I'm still reading it. Uh, it's called Super Bloom by Nicholas Carr, and I highly recommend it, uh, for if anyone hasn't read it. Uh, and in the book he talks about just the evolution of how we've communicated over the past two centuries. And, uh, he talks a lot about letter writing and how that was an act of communication. It, it was that there was a very practical function to it, of sharing information between two individuals when there was no other technology to do so. However, he also says it was a, a very strong exercise in self-reflection because to be able to write a really thoughtful letter, one had to sit down, gather one's thoughts. Think about how they want to frame it. Paper was a, a, you know, not something you could go to Office Depot and buy. It was, there was a limited resource of, of a, of a sense inst kind of similar, right? And, and so you had to be really thoughtful and turn inward and think and wrestle through ideas and come up with how you wanna structure them. Who has time. Like we, we don't have time to do that very much. Mm-hmm. And so I think we've lost, uh, the ability to flex that muscle. Uh, and, and I think it's, it's when we can give ourselves maybe a little bit of silence, a little bit of space, a little bit of encouragement, and really. Home, a practice of self deflection. I do think we become better communicators, whether through writing or speech or, or some other vehicle, and it is so fascinating just about the, you know. The change of the materials over time and how they were less available and how much that would change our ability to self process. Like is there an equivalent in the digital age? Are we self-reflecting when we prepare an email or are we more, much more impulsive? Are we not connecting in the same way? Uh, well, the book would argue we are more impulsive. And I think I, I do think people put thought, depending on the communication, there's no blanket statement that would be appropriate here. However, I think overall we trend in the direction of, I'm just gonna put out like a stream of conscious, whatever's on the top of my mind. Without asking myself the hard questions about why I think that way or where is this coming from, or what emotional state is bringing this about, or what, how can I connect this to something else that happened previously or let me understand the reader what, what um, tone and voice words do they need to hear for this to really. Resonate with'em. You know, we don't really, I, most of us, I don't think really ask those questions or really dig deeper beyond what's on the top of our mind. What's fascinating about what you're saying, Christina, is that this stream of consciousness is something that I see in spoken communication. So many of the people who come to see me find that they're thinking and speaking at the same time, they're speaking unconsciously. They're not feeling able to really like put their own voice into their unconscious communication, and it really feels powerful to think of that as like a lack of. Confidence, like a lack of authority in asking myself, what do I wanna say? Because I fear that a lot of us don't trust our voices or don't think we're good writers or good speakers. And how do we develop that muscle if we feel unpracticed in it? Mm. One way to do it is. To develop a, a journaling habit or practice. I found that to be really critical in my own communication, I think to, to write every day that in a way that's not shared ever, uh, but that just allows me a playground in my mind to see what is there and to make connections and. Uh, to know myself and therefore, when I am in a situation where I need to communicate, I have a little bit more to work with. I really think that that's what's lacking right now is this self knowing. Yes. Yes. Uh, I think it was Socrates who said to, to know thyself is, is the beginning of wisdom and. Wisdom is kind of lacking. We don't have a lot there. Yeah. And I also, I have a lot of clients who teach on leadership and who talk about, you know, self-awareness as the foundation of leadership. And of course we can talk about the importance of communication in that too. And there's something really powerful. I also think with social media. Where so much of our written communication, but even spoken communication video is like for someone else, or if it's for presentational. Moments on social media. It's not this self-reflective, it's not writing a letter to one other person. It's like a broadcast. Yeah. That I think has changed how we communicate too. A hundred percent. You sound like you have read this book I'm talking about because I need to read this book. It sounds good. Yes.'cause in it he talks about social media as being the first time that we ever had mass to mass communication. There was always one to mass or one-to-one. Now we're in this era of mass to mass. And initially the thinking is, well, the thinking was, well, when that happens, my goodness, we would never have a disagreement because we're all able to talk and share our opinions and perspectives and find common ground. And it's like this massive democratization of, of word. And that's actually not how it's played out, obviously, it's just become right, the noise and, uh, and, and the more, the volume that is now possible because of various technologies has further limited our ability to self-reflect, to compose a coherent, thoughtful message. Uh, and we are overwhelmed by also digesting at the same time by like taking in with drinking from a fire hose and then also trying to spit back out something coherent. And it just, it's kind of a losing battle. Wow. Especially because I think we are not all agreeing on what the truth is. You know, we, going back to that word truth. Yeah. And this moment feels like a, a real pressure cooker for what we're talking about here, Christina, and you help at Parable, you help organizations speak their story and. What are you seeing in terms of this moment where I imagine it might be challenging for certain organizations to be true to their identity? Yeah. Given the constraints that we're seeing on the federal level, the authoritarianism, the silencing, the censoring. So how can organizations be true in this moment? Hmm. That's a really good question. And it starts with that inner reflection of. What is, uh, what are the uncompromisable aspects of who we are or as a leader who, who one is, and, and then there's a continuum. There's going to be, you know, one side, there's the uncompromisable aspects of, of an individual organizational's identity. And then there'll be more layers beyond that of, you know, other, other ways of communicating that in an ideal world an organization could employ. Uh, and right now I think some of those extra layers are kind of, we're, we're thinking a little bit harder about, okay, do I wanna go out there? Do I wanna go to that extent? Uh, and yet I, I, what I'm seeing with clients is at that very core of the uncompromisable aspects to one's identity are, are unchanged and clients are leaning into them with more conviction and we're just having to get creative with how, uh. And what I'm seeing as well is, is a bit of a splitting for better or for worse, between language that an organization might use internally versus externally. And so I think now more than ever, there's an opportunity to really have thoughtful strategies for both of those. Arenas. Yeah. Uh, yeah, internal communication. Uh, and, and the external one, and I can give you an example of what I mean by this. Uh, you know, there are, I work with a lot of nonprofit clients and some, some of them receive federal funding and even on a good day, uh. An organization needs to use certain words to be able to qualify for federal funding. I can give a more concrete example. One client I have is a school for children with learning differences, and this school rightfully so, sort of shutters at the idea of using the word disability. However, to receive federal funding, they need to use the language that's. Has been specified by the government. Yeah, right. And so we then had to become really disciplined in what's the messaging that we use in those situations versus what are we talking just colloquially with our external community? And then how are we talking about it internally? And obviously there's gonna be similarities, but having that discipline is becoming very important. More so now than ever. Yeah, absolutely. And really having to think about audience in maybe an even more specific way and like, you know, you talked about this be social media being the first time that it's like many to many, and that's really fascinating. Yeah. I'm really interested in how do we speak one to many, whether that's an organization or an individual with this idea that we have to speak to people. I've always talked about public speaking as like we can't speak to a group of 50 people. We're actually only speaking to one person at a time. So how do you think about making a message resonate when it is to so many diverse, different types of people? I think about a few questions. I, I might pose the question of what is so true that can't go unsaid? Uh, and, and more so, you know, what is so true that it must be said by you or like the individual or the organization. And, uh, then I really encourage clients of all kinds to view the process of getting to the message as being the point in itself. The, the wrestling that has to happen, that inner reflection, the, the friction that has to happen because it's not easy to find a, a short few words that can describe what an organization or an individual does that everyone's on board with. There's friction in that process, and what I try to encourage my clients to see is that that's often the point. I think, uh, that's where the, that's where we can also talk about ai, to be honest, because AI, we're, we're, might be getting to a very similar outcome, but the process has been totally removed. Right? The wrestling, the friction, the, of knowing, the self-reflection, that's all completely moot. Uh, and. And, and I, I think we're remiss if we, if we don't acknowledge that I'm having a moment here. I'm really just seeing so much of our creative process and we know that there is this tension, there is this friction and this self knowing and AI taking that out. Is it a less interesting result? Certainly I, I think the answer is yes. Yeah. But I also can think of this in terms of when I was in art school and the people who didn't have to work day jobs and were fully supported by family, you know, even after art school, I have to say, I don't think that the art was as good. Oh, interesting. Because there was no friction in how they created. Aha. I am a big believer that like our limitations breed creativity. As a theater person, I always was like, give me less of a budget because we're gonna have more resourcefulness and scrapiness. Totally. A hundred percent. Yes. Yeah. What you're talking about of like that, having to kind of edit and choose. It's a painful process of excavation almost, is what it sounds like. Yes. Yeah. And, and I think in this day and age we tend, people can tend to think of communication as, you know, more is better. Just like put it out there and put something out there and. The more I do this work, the more I think there's a mastery that's required, a really serious discipline, a message discipline, uh, with, with what we say and how and when. And yeah, that, that's human stuff. Like that's not ever gonna be a computer business. Wow. So can we talk a little bit about ai? Because I think what you were talking about before with that like vulnerable self-reflection, AI kind of cancels that out and how can we continue to strengthen our own voices with these tools that are like really becoming so. It's disruptive. Even in our every day, they feel almost like you have to use them. How can we keep strengthening our voices? I think just because one can use them doesn't mean that one should. Honestly, I, I think a lot, there's so many parallels I can think about. I can think about fast food. It's like just because we could go through, go to the drive through and get some french fries and a Big Mac, it doesn't mean that we probably should do that every day. Our taste buds will change. Our bodies will change. Eating slow, thoughtfully cooked food is part of being human. Just the same way as looking inwards. Composing a message and communicating it is human. Yeah. And we have to move away from all of this efficiency and productivity and you know. Just getting to the end result while really negating the process, like you said. Yes, I think there's gonna be many organizations that say we don't care about the process. We want, we want just like a really cool outcome and AI is great. Uh, and you'll probably get that really great outcome and you don't need a marketing team anymore. Hmm. There's also gonna be organizations and leaders. Who say, well, I want the process. I don't wanna phone it, phone it in. I don't want the fast food. I think ease and efficiency have a true cost on humanity. You know, I mentioned the fast food, but also texting the prevalence in zooms of. Cheap fast shipping of goods, you know, like the list goes on and on. That that efficiency actually brings about a cost that often we don't realize until a little bit further in. Yeah, I actually left social media, most social media except for LinkedIn earlier this year, and I found that it's a really interesting. Impact that I'm going deeper with fewer people and less wide. Mm. But it feels more meaningful. I love, feels like what I need right now. Yeah. It's it, what you're describing sounds nourishing and I don't even think we stop to think is like what I'm consuming, nourishing, or not.'cause we're just bombarded. I, I read something that said the amount of data that existed in the world from the birth of humanity until something like 2003 is now created every year or, or something. Oh my goodness. Ridiculous. Like that. I, again, I'm, I'm probably butchering the exact stat, but, but something as drastic as that. And for a while we were under the guise that we could keep up. And that we have to keep up. And I think in my own personal life, it's, it's becoming so blatantly obvious. I can't keep up. This is actually miserable. Yeah. And so I'm gonna consume a whole lot less of it. And I, I wanna consume something that's like really healthy and good and feel Yeah. I think we're gonna see a bit of a slowing down and. Us returning to more analog. You know, we can see like cassette tapes coming back and all these fun things, but I think we also need to really honor the time it takes to do this reflection work. Yeah. And I wonder if you could like take us into parable a little bit. Like what are some of the things that organizations come to Parable for, and then what do they walk away with and what should we know about that process? Yeah, that's a great question. A lot of organizations come to Parable because they say they need a new mission statement, and often what they're looking for is a redo of a three to five sentence mishmosh that they currently have, and what they walk away with is something like six or 10 words, huh? Really gets to what they do. Uh, or they might need a clear direction of where they're headed and almost bordering on strategic planning. Hmm. And what I often talk about is, well, that's really hard to do without having a sense of who one is. Like how, how, how can we chart the course forward if we're not really sure like what we're bringing along with us. And so yeah, even strategic planning. The starting point in my work, in my opinion, it starts with this kind of inner reflection and identity work. Wow. So it's really starting with identity and then we can get to mission, who we are, and then we can get to vision. Yeah. What we're building. Yeah. But if we don't start with that solid foundation. And we don't know who we are. Totally. And it's, it's the same, I, I go back to that metaphor of as something stamped on or branded on versus like lived out, come, coming from within. Yeah. And, uh, yeah, there are plenty of strategic plans, let's say, that are really solid, highly best practiced. And yet might they be a fit for every organization if they're just stamped on? Probably not. Hmm. I see this with my clients too. They, some people come to me and they want really quick tools and techniques. They don't want to go deep, they don't wanna personalize it, and it doesn't have the same impact because it's not theirs. Yes. I, I find that in, in, you're, you're so right. The impact is not going to be there, and I think what we as professionals then can do to, to. Kind of prod clients in the, in this slower direction is, is this instead to just pose questions? Uh, you know, I find more and more, I didn't always start out doing this, but, but more and more now, if I get a request for those kind of quick tools, quick fixes, I'll share a list of questions for them to think about instead of giving a list of tools. And that, is that really, um, is that what you know? At first they're like, I don't really want that. Just want you to tell me what to do. And again, the process is the point, and that process is the point. I'm not gonna be able to tell you what to do. The process is the point. I love that so much. I'm learning so much about your process and how you work with clients. And I wonder, Christina, what about for those of us who, we might be individuals, we might be a part of organizations, but we wanna do that deeper work to know ourselves. We want to be able to articulate who we are, our identity, what can we do to practice that and to start listening to ourselves, I think in giving ourselves the space to pay attention. Like, uh, I find, uh, a lot of my days happen without me realizing it, and Yep. I hate that. So me too. When I pay attention to a longing, it's hugging and nagging that is coming from within when I pay attention to. A piece of art or color that really captures my eye when I pay attention to the sound of a laugh that just feels contagious and infectious. It's like that is how I come to know myself. And unfortunately, we live in a world where that's really hard to do. It's hard to do by accident. Yeah. It almost feels like you have to go against the grain of our productive capitalist machine. Yeah. But I think it's so important right now. Yeah. You know, one practical thing that I've done that's really helped me and my own ability to communicate and that, and of course to self-reflect even before that, is I got, I got rid of an iPhone. And I got rid of things like Spotify and, uh, just the, the wash of content that I was consuming that I think a lot of us consume without realizing it. I needed there to be more spaciousness in my brain at all times because I don't think we can pay attention. When we're cluttered and squeezed and restricted, there has to be a sense of inner spaciousness, a sense of inner spaciousness, and how without that, we cannot hear our own voices. I don't think so. Yeah. How beautiful. I wonder, Christina, would you be able to tell us, how do we find more about parable? Well, you can go to find your parable.com and you'll, you'll see a little bit more about the services we offer and our wonderful team there. And like you, the only social media I'm really on is LinkedIn, so that's another place where folks can do that. See some of my writing and connect. I'm really grateful that we could have this conversation today. Christina, I'm grateful that you have the expertise to support mission-driven organizations to live in their truest identity. I'm also so grateful to hear that you're seeing more and more organizations double down on what they believe in. Yeah, and knowing who they are. That gives me so much hope. And I'm just really grateful that we could have this conversation today. I am so grateful to you. I always enjoy working with you as a client and now as a colleague and friend, and it's been wonderful to, to be on and get to talk today. Thank you, Christina. Thank you for sharing your words.
